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Jamie Oliver creates World Cup recipes for disaster
Jamie Oliver has created an exciting new range of firm World cup snacks that can be enjoyed conveniently while staring open-mouthed at unfolding sporting disaster or genocidal pandemonium in Brazil....
View ArticleBacon to become official England World Cup sponsor
Bacon is to become England’s official ‘World Cup Hangover’ sponsor for the 2014 World Cup, beating off stiff competition from other market leaders to land the coveted prize. Rashers of prime pork...
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Brazilians protest Nadal’s Wimbledon ranking
In Brazil, over a million people are reported to have joined demonstrations against the seeding of Rafael Nadal in this year’s Wimbledon. While many might consider the tennis tournament to be an...
View ArticleLadbrokes confirms God had £100 on Neymar injury
With many players praying for positive outcomes in the World Cup it came as no surprise to Ladbrokes manager Geoff Beesley when God walked into his shop and bet £5 on Columbia making it through to the...
View Article‘We’ll always have the bikini wax’ says a resolute Brazil
Last night the streets of Rio were lined with shell-shocked football fans, discarded yellow shirts and, as the year ended in 14, predictably rampant Germans. As a nation grieved and distanced itself...
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‘Look, can we all just focus on the poverty?’ says Brazil
Brazil has come out united in the fact that it’s the country’s disgraceful levels of poverty and inequality we should all really be focusing on. Home to around 23,000 street children, plus 23 other men...
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Murray apologises for expressing non-bland opinion
Following his last minute show of support for the Yes campaign in last week’s Scottish independence referendum, tennis star Andy Murray has issued a statement of apology to the British public for any...
View ArticleDress rehearsal for Rio opening ceremony ‘nowhere near long enough’, IOC says
The opening ceremony for the Rio Olympics is to be significantly extended amid fears the event might not be a big enough waste of time and money. Olympic bosses were unimpressed with a dress rehearsal...
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